I Doubt...

I doubt anyone would write for me
Since I so rarely get,
The things I set my heart upon
The things I might regret.

So little do I now expect
And have little hope or fear,
I draw a circle around myself
And find my pleasure there.

I do not like my acquaintances
nor do they like me,
Their words are hard, like jagged rocks
Their trembling eyes like scree.

Alone I read, I dream, I shout
With my music loud I wait,
For something that will never come
I blame my faultless fate.

I throw myself upon others' will
Yet know none will ever say,
The words that show me to myself
And burn my heart away...